Friday, July 8, 2011

Still Small Voice

The still small voice. Well, I would never define either of my children in this way. They are not still, and they do not have small voices!! However, God uses their voices to reach me when I can't hear HIS voice. Times of struggles and doubt surround me lately. Multiple "to do" lists, places to be, and the daunting task of trying to find a job weigh on my mind constantly.  Yesterday, I was waiving my white flag to surrender and praying that nothing else would go wrong. Drew was working late so the kids and I had dinner. As I’m thinking that I can’t wait for this day to be over Cane begins singing this song. “God gave me you for the ups and downs…” This is an amazing song that describes what a marriage should be and what we try to make ours like. Anyway, my point is that God always puts a song in Cane’s heart to make me snap out of it. Just the other day he was singing, “Motions” by Matthew West.  I’m usually so worked up in the details and situations of life that I drown everything out. God knows a song and my kid's voice will catch my ear! It reminds me of the scripture in Kings (I kings 19:21) where it talks about God NOT being the earthquake and NOT being in the fire. Instead, he came to Elijah in a whisper. Hearing Cane sing his songs is God’s way of trying to get me to listen. Sometimes I don’t see or hear HIM in the (metaphorical) earthquakes of life. Rather, I see and hear him by loving my kids. God can work through them to reach me in my stubborn doubtfulness. Don’t let me leave Alley out of this one. Her tactics are intentional and bold. She will bring me a bible or scripture on paper and give me a look that says, “You need to read this.” Of course, this doesn’t make the struggles of life disappear. However, I realize I have two amazing kids,a great God that loves me, and a man that God gave me for the ups and downs.  So I will try to listen more.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011


Life was so hectic last year, that I only blogged once. Hopefully, I will have more time on my hands now. Things are a little bit slower thanks to the milestone of GRADUATION!
I am a college graduate. Can I tell you how long I've waited to say that? A really long time. Graduation was fun, but overwhelming. It has taken me over a month to fully process how I feel about it all. My final semester was crazy, and I hated every minute of school. I felt like it was robbing me of my life, my time with my kids and Drew, and my freedom. I just couldn't wait to finish. When graduation time came, it felt like just another day. However, it turned out that I realized what a blessing it was. I have a huge sense of pride and accomplishment. I'm still feeling a little shocked that that part of my life is over. I didn't think it would ever be behind me! Up until graduation I kept thinking, "There has to be a mistake?" I guess it's the Negative Nancy inside me that says things can't be this good (or easy) in my life. Graduation was nice. I had my friends and family that have supported me though my entire life, with me to celebrate the occasion.
Of course, sharing it with the love of my life and our great kids was the biggest blessing. After all, we have been through it all together. They were all such troopers about my late nights of class, the "not right now mom's writing a paper" response, and my overall exhausted state of mind.

Ok, it's been a month (since graduation) and I must say I miss school. Who knew I would go from despising it to missing it? I know it's because I am in a weird transition point in my life. Life was so busy and now it's too slow. I am looking forward to my alternative certification teaching class, and being able to get a job. I guess Drew is right, I thrive on busy.

Friday, February 19, 2010

How Far We've Come

2010 has brought about a time of reflection for me. Being in this sort of mood motivated me to blog. Drew and I have almost been married for almost thirteen years As I think back over our life together I can't help but to feel like time is flying by! The past thirteen years have been a life of struggles, joy, happiness, and confusion. Most importantly it's been a life FULL of love. I can't believe how far we've come as family....
Our story starts when a sweet, patient boy meets a stubborn, untrusting girl.  Ok, he's stubborn too.  After much persistance on Drew's part - I fell for him hard.  We were young, foolish, and in love. Somehow we have grown up together. We are still in love. The difference is now we really know what love is!
I love this man more everyday. He is my best friend and partner in everything!
Drew and I are blessed with an amazing love and friendship.

On top of that...two darn near PERFECT kids. Of course, I'll always say that because I love 'em no matter what. 

Being a mom is the greatest.  Every day I look into my kids eyes and see how fast they are growing. The questions they ask and the situations they are faced with are proof that this time in my life is moving fast. I wish I could keep them young and innocent forever but I can't. 

My Girl ~Alley is becoming quite the beautiful, talented, smart young lady. I look at her sometimes and can't believe she is the same baby girl I used to rock to sleep every night. She is kind, loving, and very STUBBORN. She is exactly who God designed her to be. 

Then there is Cane. My sweet baby boy. He is equally as awesome as Alley but completely different.  He is very sensitive but he loves to make people laugh. We can never really know what Cane will say.  He is our wild card!

I've had people ask me if there is truth in the phrase.. "you're gonna miss this."

Oh Yeah! It is so true! 
I found myself making more time for wii games, tossing the football with Cane and girl talk with Alley. The three of us laying cramped up on the couch together laughing, talking or praying is the greatest place on earth. I don't want to miss these moments. These moments are what life is about. So we've come a long way. This life journey we are on as a family is the narrow path less worn.